Where I Am

Well, it's been a little while since I shared some of what has been on my heart. My first impulse is always to come and blog everything I'm thinking and feeling because I LOVE to write, but God has been teaching me that I must first seek Him and His counsel before I spout everything off to the world for their opinion, hence why I've been a little quiet.

With that being said, I thought I'd share a verse that my Bible study has me meditating on this week:

Psalm 27:13-14 "I would have despaired unless I had believed that I WOULD see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; Be strong and let your heart take courage; Yes, wait for the Lord." (emphasis mine)

*You know how at different times in your life, God emphasizes different lessons, looking back, they're really attributes, about Himself? Well, my lesson for the past 9 months has been and continues to be: God is a good God. Now, growing up in a Christian home, this may sound like a silly lesson to have to learn, but having somewhat of a legalistic church upbringing, I think somewhere along the way, I stopped believing God was inately good, and that if I did all the right things, He would be good to me in return. This is not true. God's character, I'm learning...a little painfully, is by nature and definition, good.

I love this verse because it gives promise that we will experience this inate goodness of God here on earth, in the land of the living, not just in heaven. We don't have to earn it, and it isn't just an eternity-only reality. It's a here and now truth, but as the verse continues, we sometimes must wait for the reality of this truth. God's timing is not our timing, and His ways are not our ways, but our hearts should "take courage," "wait," and "believe" that God is good. I would despair if I did not believe that I could see the goodness of God in this land of the living!

And to be honest, life is not all roses right now...many thorns for various reasons keep pricking, but God is still good--that never changes. So when I look past my wounds and allow God to heal me, I not only see His goodness in trying times and difficult circumstances, I feel His goodness toward me. It's a comfort and a hope that when fully embraced--fully, deeply believed--makes life bearable, and even enjoyable when the world around you just doesn't seem to have a drop of goodness left in it.

I don't know how long God is going to have to keep orchestrating circumstances in my life to help me understand, embrace, and accept this attribute of Himself. It may take me years before my soul truly believes this truth, but I am thankful that whether I honestly, deeply believe this truth or not that IT'S STILL TRUTH. God is good.

What attribute about Himself has God been teaching you lately?