Looking Back to Look Ahead

Not two days after I had printed, stuffed, & stamped my Christmas letter for this year, did we get the phone call from corporate office at Chick-fil-A.  Joey got THE job!!!!  His dream since he first applied to Chick-fil-A after graduating from Kennesaw State University in 2000 was to work on staff.  Back then, they saw a young face, fresh out of college with not quite enough experience to suit their needs.  Joey knew God had called him to work for Chick-fil-A, so when they said, "How about becoming on operator?"  He swallowed his dream, and said, "Whatever it takes.  This is the company for me."

And so began our 10 year journey as Chick-fil-A owners/operators.  In 2001 we got married and, he moved from operating a Chick-fil-A inside a Kroger with about 6 people on staff including himself, to a run-down mall in Chattanooga when chicken prices were high and he worked open to close some days to keep labor low--he also actually ran a profit out of that store, and that's saying something.  Next stop (2004) was his first free-stander chance in good, ole' South Cobb.  He took over after another operator, and during those years, we experienced our greatest blessing financially; we also were DINKs during that time (Double Income No Kids); nevertheless, his performance at that store warranted his receipt of a brand new store four  miles down the road.  So in 2007, with our first baby on the way, he birthed another baby of his own, his chance to prove himself and create a store that had his name on it.  A real chance to show Chick-fil-A what Joey Durham was made of.

And he did.  He fostered a staff that respected him as a leader, that we loved dearly, and who treated his customers with care.  He developed systems and ideas that worked well, and he earned the respect and loyalty of his business minded customers.  Yet, he still felt God calling him to more.  He always feels God calling him to more, and I love that about him=)

So in 2009, with our second child on the way, he followed God's direction again and started the MBA program at Mercer University.  We buckled down, became super intentional about our family time and life, argued often, took lots of deep breaths, and stayed bowed at the feet of our Lord, clinging to His ankles for life support.

In November of 2010 the dream opportunity came into focus.  You see throughout these ten years, Joey never lost sight of nor the desire for the dream of a staff position at Chick-fil-A, and believe me, I saw him beg in tears many a time for God to remove that desire, and He never did.  It seemed that now, the time was ripe.  Business consultant positions were coming available, and people were talking about Joey's desire.  And so the long, thirteen-month interview process began.

We couldn't talk about it for LOTS of reasons, but for the entirety of 2011 we have been nose deep in prayer and patience and waiting and hoping.  For thirteen months, my husband interviewed on and off with different individuals at the home office for varying positions.  I'm not joking when I say I lost track of the number of interviews after about twenty had taken place.  For 13 months, my husband served as VP of the Atlanta Marketing Board trying to fix a budget and influence change into the heart of a market all while keeping a free-standing store running at top speed that was experiencing exponential growth in sales all while under the scrutiny of home office employees because why should they hire him for staff if he can't even run a good store? For 13 months, we road the roller coaster of interviews and waiting, while he also managed to finish the last three semesters of his MBA, which anyone knows are always the hardest, and all the while, my husband supported me, loved me, and was there for our family.

Oh, there were times I felt his absence both physically and mentally, but God was so good to fill in any holes in our relationship with Himself, and believe me when I say He is more than enough and all we both needed.

So when Joey got the phone call at 5pm on Wednesday, December 14th, 2011 to formally accept an offer from Chick-fil-A corporate to become a financial consultant for the southwest region, we were ecstatic!!!!  The waiting was over, the answer was clear, a new adventure would finally begin!!!  A new chapter to be written!!!!

A. New. Chapter. To. Be. Written.....Thursday night after we received the news and reality began to sink in, I cried myself to sleep and woke up Friday morning still crying.  For two nights I had had horrible snake dreams, and I had to admit to myself that I was scared. to. death.  Scared of change, scared of loosing my husband to travel and long work days, scared of losing my quality time I've had with him for 10 years, scared of losing the flexibility and unlimited vacation days we've had for 10 years.  Scared of starting over and arguing about his phone usage and time he would be getting home all over again.  Scared this new job would interfere with his relationship with his children.  Scared that with the reality of his dream, our family would pale in comparison, that I would inevitably, in time, lose my husband completely.  Just plain scared.

And that morning he laid in bed with me, on a Friday morning (the busiest day of the week at his store), and he held me while I cried.  He set the kids up with Pop Tarts and a movie and crawled back in bed and kept holding me while I cried.  He was there for me, always has been, and I trust that will never change, but more importantly, as I dried my eyes and finally crept out of bed around 9:30am, I found myself clinging with all my heart to the truth this last year has taught me, the only truth that will carry me through the rest of my life, through anything....

I believe it took 13 months for Chick-fil-A to hire Joey not because they had any questions about him, but because God needed those 13 months to teach me that I need to need Him more than I need to need Joey. And I'm ok with that.  When I breathe in the truth of this statement, I can freely breathe, I can relax, I can trust, and I can move on and keep living life.  Joey's new job isn't so scary.  Raising two kids in a messed up world isn't so scary.  Being alone at night while Joey travels isn't so scary.  Because I need God more than I need anyone else in this world.  I know that now.  That's the lesson 2011 has taught me.

And this lesson did not come easy.  It came by laboring over God's Word and seeking for Him.  It came through countless conversations with my husband.  It came covered in tears and questions.  It came during tense moments, periods of doubt and double-guessing, and long days of simply doing the next thing.  Doing the things that I know God commands like loving others, fellow-shipping with other believers, giving to those in need, serving the Lord in how He leads.  This lesson came while I was doing life for the Lord.

It was no grand epiphany.  It was no moment of AhHa.  It was waking up one morning and realizing that I no longer coveted my husband's time and attention for myself.  I coveted the time and attention of my Father in heaven, and for Joey, I wished nothing more than that God would use him to impact the lives of other leaders, men, operators with the God-given influence the Lord has gifted him.

And this lesson of needing God more than I need anyone or anything is a lesson I will keep having to learn.  I'm not going to live each day to the fullness of this reality, but I can confess and move on and reclaim the victory I have in Christ.  I can depend again and lean fully again and let go again after I inevitably take the reins again.  There will be more lessons in life to learn, but this one is a milestone.

In the first of this year, I accomplished a huge goal, then found myself in a strange place trying to piece together all that God was teaching me.  Look back at those links, near the bottoms of those posts, see what I wrote and listen to where I am now in this post.  No one will ever be able to convince me that God doesn't work in our lives!!!  I have written proof and account of His sovereignty and plan as the Great Weaver of all things Good in our lives.

Am I still scared?  Absolutely.  No question.  But I choose to focus on all the good God has lying ahead for our family.  I will look past all that I perceive I'm losing, and look forward with gratefulness to all that God is doing and will do.


"Thank You Father that Joey got this job; that he gets to live his dream!  So few men in life get this opportunity.  Thank You that You have gone before us, and that You will provide the time and adventures for our family.  Thank You that my husband will be home every Saturday for the next 10 years because that has not been part of our lives.  Thank You that this lifts an unseen burden off the shoulders of Joey, so that he can live a longer, fuller life by Your blessing.  Thank You for each opportunity you will provide Joey to reach the lives of other men & operators.  Thank You that my children will see a living example of hard work and perseverance in their father.  That they will see it always pays off in full plus some, even if 10 years  of perseverance must go by before the realization of their dreams.  Thank You for making Yourself fully present in my heart and life as to fill the gaps I knew would be there and will be there.  Thank You for trusting us to be good stewards of yet another journey with You.  Praise Your Most Holy Name!  Amen!"


What is it, my friend, that you dream? desire?  Have you offered it up to the Lord?  If it's still there, He hasn't taken it away, do you still work for it?  Do you persevere to do the things you know you must do now to achieve all that you dream of then?  Never give up.  Never lose sight.  Never lose hope.  Look back to see what the Lord has done and look forward to where He will take you!!!