I Run--The Day Of

What is it about the morning of a race that gets your blood pumping so early in the morning? I've been awake since 4:15am. Really didn't sleep much before that in expectation.  I've been here since it was dark. Thinking.  Praying.  Hoping.
As the athletes begin to pour in and set up, I can't help but begin to compare.  To feel less than. Inadequate.  Unprepared.
The sunlight begins to fill the sky and with each ounce of light being shed in the atmosphere, my heart begins to quicken and stomach churn. Can I really do this again?
What was I thinking? !?!?
Then my mind and heart remember.  I can't. But God can.
I pray silent prayers rebuking satan's attempts to chip away at my faith. How can he attack when I agree with him?  I am inadequate.  There is nothing in my own strength that will get me through the grueling 2 hours of racing other than the thought, 'God can.'
Maybe this is why I keep doing this.  Keep pushing myself.  Keep towing the line. Because when I'm in the middle of a race, I am precariously aware that my body, my life, is not my own.  In the middle of a race, all I do is hope and yearn and strain and push for the finish.  I am hyper aware of God's voice and presence and ever present help.
I like being that close to His presence. His self. His being.  I think that's why I keep coming back.
What race are you running? Are you still preparing for your race? Maybe life is hard and tedious, boring or sometimes pointless? Keep training. God is right there. He's about to show up in a real way.  Bet on it.
Are you in the middle of it yet?  Do you feel like you're about to give up, give in, give out? Don't!  Push a little harder. Focus a little narrower.  And listen. God is right there. Find strength in His presence, in His voice, in Him.
It's time to race. It's time to put your faith training to work. He won't fail you. He never does.
The Son is up. The finish is closer than you think. 

Munchkin Moments

May hasn't been just full of busyness and events.  I've noticed such a change in both of my kiddos in the past month, that they deserve their own little blog this month.

Savannah is still Little Miss Independent.  Every day she is more and more capable, more and more able to communicate, understand, and respond.  We talk about patience a lot around our house, as I'm sure most parents do, but it's so hard to teach patience when your child will just inevitably do things herself!  I caught this moment on camera the other day....

I don't think she ever even asked me if she could have chocolate milk.  She just decided she wanted some.  So she pulled the stool to the fridge.  Got the chocolate syrup and milk out.  Poured a cup of milk for herself AND for Weston--so sweet, then preceded to fill the cups with chocolate syrup as you can see...

Fortunately, I was able to intervene before these chocolate syrup drinks with a little milk added were served.  There was enough chocolate in just one cup to make the rest of the entire half gallon of milk a chocolate milk half gallon!  Too funny=)  Love this girl though, and love her heart.  She is always thinking of others, especially her brother.

Joey took her on a date a while back to Build-A-Bear, and told her she could make whatever she wanted.  She came home with two stuffed animals.  A camouflage bear for Weston named Goliath, and an adorable monkey for me named Booger.  She had no interest in anything for herself.  All the fun was in making and giving to others.  I love that.

She keeps us on her toes with her constant antics, ideas, and games--always done her way.  (My family would say I shouldn't be surprised.)  However, I do get tired of being micro-managed.  I have found myself several times sighing at her in frustration and saying, "Stop telling me what to do.  I did the first thing you asked, now stop.  People don't like it when you tell them what to do all the time, every second, for everything."  I'm praying for her to have special friends in her life that love her just the way she is--a heart of gold hidden behind some bossy pants=) 

I also think it's funny when we go to the dry cleaners that she sits in the back seat and reminds me very adult-like, "Don't forget, Mommy.  Pants press only for daddy."  Sigh...hee hee.  Think we go to the dry cleaners once a week? ;)  Or, I love the fact that she sings all the words to the songs on our Christian radio station, the Fish 104.7.  She knows all the words to Blessings by Lora Story.  Glad now that I've chosen to listen to Christian music in the car...who knows what she'd be spouting?

Funniest thing they both do--my babysitter, Savannah Veale, is the one who turned them on to the idea of chocolate milk.  She comes once a week for mine and Joey's date night, so the kids love her, and she's just another member of the family=)  Apparently, she has taught my kids to "shake up" their chocolate milk.  They do so by standing up, holding their arms out to their sides like they are surfing, then shaking their little bottoms back and forth, while you actually shake the milk and chocolate.  Makes me laugh out loud every time they remember to do it unprompted!

Had to include a few pics from a recent play date visit to Fernbank Museum.  I totally enjoyed watching both my kids enjoy learning.  You'll see Savannah below petting a skink...so thankful there were no snakes at the live animal show...whew.  Weston walked around the museum all day stopping at terrarium tanks and saying, "Oh! Wow!"  Then would just stare intently.  The best was when we walked through the dinosaur exhibit.  He would stare high in the sky and run from one dinosaur model to the next yelling, "Oh wow!  Oh wow!"  His facial expression of complete joy and disbelief was priceless.

Weston had his adenoids taken out on May 10th, and his little personality has just come alive since then!  I am so grateful that we had this procedure done.  He hasn't had a runny nose nor even sounded congested since those big, ugly things came out of his throat.  It hurts my heart to think he's been in so much pain since he was born, but we had this surgery done as soon as could be allowed.  I think he hears better; therefore, his speech improved almost immediately.  He understands more words and is able to repeat them properly.  He's also been eating better, and just so funny.

Every morning I wake up to a very loud, "Moooommmmeeeee, hair are you?  Daaaddddeeeee, hair are you?  Siiiisssseeeeee, hair are you?"  My favorite is his love for our dog Samson, affectionately know as "Fammy" to Weston.  "Fammmeee, where are you?"  Is ofter heard around our house, as Samson often tries to hide from Weston's many forms of attention, which include and are not limited to wrestling, smothering, chasing with toilet brush, chasing with baby stroller, or just chasing in general with loud shrills of laughter=)

Another personal favorite, every time I get ready to put him down for bed we read stories.  I always hold him up and ask him what book he'd like to read.  Very intently and slowly, he will look at each book, all the while saying, "Ummm. Hmm. (deep breath) Ummm.," very contemplatively until he chooses the book he wants.  His seriousness is always in sharp contract to his playfulness, and he is definitely still my little lover boy.  Always in search of someone to hold, hug, wrestle with.

And as much as I adore Savannah's heart behind her loud, rambunctious concerts, Weston is really the one who can already carry a tune.  He sings nonsense tunes all the time in the back of the car, and he knows the tune to the B-I-B-L-E as well.  Right on tune, he will very cheerfully sing, "The B-i-b-i-b-i-b."  Hitting the high note on the end right on key, even if it's not the right letter=) Then enthusiastically shout, "Bible!!" Like we always do at the end of the song=)

He loves playing with his sister, and their laughter around our house will echo in my heart for years to come.  I am so grateful for two great kids.  "Thank you Lord for these little blessings.  May I be a good steward of what you've chosen to give."